Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Where Can Bryant Go?

So Kobe has had enough and wants out. The tough part is actually not finding a place for him to go, it's finding a place he WANTS to go.

Let's rule out a few places:

1.Miami: Why would you want to put them back together after everything, even if they have made up? And why would you do that to your star?
2.New York: The Knicks could only pull off a trade if they used a time machine to switch their team with the one from 10 years ago. And even then they'd be hemorrhaging picks.
3.Atlanta: No way Kobe goes anywhere he can't win a championship within 4 years.
4. LAClipper: The only way that deal gets done is if they trade Brand, which would be the only incentive for Kobe to sign there.
5.Any small market team, anywhere. Kobe can spout off all he wants about playing to win, but he's got to be somewhere his image can grow. He's been partying with models and rock stars for ten years, not like he's going to stop all of a sudden, just because he's landed in Milwaukee or somewhere. So he won't land in Milwaukee or somewhere.

ONLY places Kobe can be traded.

5.New Jersey- hear me out.
6. Portland (and thereby the end of the world)

Jersey makes the most sense. Why? Because here's what you need to win with Kobe Bryant (besides Shaq and for the referees to suck your dick a la 2001). You need a rebounder, a point gaurd to run the offense, and a number two scorer to play the pippen to his jordan. That's it. And Jersey can get that done.

Let's look at our options. Kobe will only go to a team with two qualifiers:
1. A team that can win now, as in, next three years.
2. A team in a large market, or at least notable NBA franchise.

refer to these as q1 and q2

1. Phoenix:
q1: yes
q2: sorta

1. Amare, Raja Bell, first rounder in 2007, second rounder in 2008.
- this is the only way they don't give up the Hawks pick next year, and would be HORRENDOUSLY STUPID.
2. Marion, Bell, Barbosa, and the Hawks pick next year.
- If they do manage this, they better somehow figure out a three way trade with someone in the teens this year so that they can get a backup pointgaurd for Nash. This makes a ton of sense. Sadly, it means I completely abandon my Suns fanship.

ESPN NBA Trade Machine Approved: the marion trade. Amare's actually not making enough to warrant this trade. Isn't that odd?

2. Chicago
Chicago makes a TON of sense. The house that Jordan built, the young nucleus, the defensive presence/rebounder in Wallace, the young pieces to make the trade. It's sad, but this is a way better deal than any KG deal.

-Luol Deng (don't start, Kobe is more valuable, and you know it), Ben Gordon, 1st round pick in 2008.
It sounds insane to give up Deng, but at least this way you keep Thomas, you keep Hinrich, and you've got your 2007 pick to get another scorer/rebounder.
-Gordon, #9 pick in 2007, 1st round pick in 2008, Chris Duhon, Tyrus Thomas
Gordon's going to have to be in any deal. With Kobe there, there's no longer any use for him. Losing Thomas would be a huge mistake for them. But then again, it's Kobe, and putting Kobe with Hinrich, Deng, and Wallace would be worth it, because they would win the East by approximately 2000000000000000 games.

ESPN NBA trade machine approved: none. no one makes enough to cover Kobe besides Wallace, and he's trade restricted and wouldn't be moved anyway. Bulls are kind of fucked here, unless they want to pay the luxury tax out the ass or restructure somebody's contract (hi, Kirk Hinrich, want to win a championship?)

q1: no
q2: kind of
x-factor: KG.

-Wow, they need help. They don't have any sexy picks, and no good players besides KG. But, they have a ton of expiring contracts after next season. So, let's try.

-Randy Foye, Mark Blount, Mike James, and Troy Hudson, first round pick in 2008, second round pick in 2007 and 2008. These are the only players of value, and they're all for about 3-4 years, besides Foye, who is the only valuable part of the trade. The Wolves would have to sign Will Ferrell to play small forward, and even then, might be the only NBA team to play 4 on 5.
-Ricky Davis, Randy Foye, Rashad McCants, Troy Hudson and the 2007 or 2008 first round pick. Well, then. Davis is the biggie, here, cleaning off 6.4 million after 2007-2008 season. All in all, the Lakers would clean about 10 mill of the books, if they let Foye go. They're stuck with Troy Hudson, BUT, this means they're in prime position to make a move in the 2009 season for LeBron, Wade, or Melo. If I'm Lakers Management, this is the route I'm going. Suffer for two years, then sign LeBron James and kill everyone for another 5 year spurt.

NBA Trade machine approved: both.

q1: absolutely
q2: yes

Weird to think of him in Texas, but this again makes a lot of sense. Cuban wants the homerun, everyone wants him to blow up the team, but he won't... unless he can get someone that can score 80 a night and sell out every game for the next 7 years.

-I tried every possible combination to get Kobe and Dirk on the same team. No go. All the big contracts are long, all the short contracts are small. Apparently their GM's plan was to win a championship this year, and then suffer for the next decade. So...
-Dirk Nowitski, Devin Harris, #1 pick in 2007 and second round pick in 2008. I know that seems like a lot, given that Dirk is the MVP, but Kobe is undeniably a bigger value, and it's not like Dirk's stock is that high right now. But this is actually a good fit, and works under the cap. You know have for the Lakers:
1.Devin Harris
2.anyone you can find in the draft
3. Kwame Brown
4. Dirk Nowitski
5. Lamar Odom.

That's not a bad team. It's not a great team, but it's the closest way for you to look like you're not getting hosed, and you can trade dirk again in a year, or negotiate to pay him more money for less time and get him off the books.

for the mavs, you've got
1.Jason Terry
2.Kobe Bryant
3.Josh Howard
4.Eric Dampier
5. Desagna Diop

and that pretty much fills the formula I referenced earlier, point gaurd, rebounders, secondary scorer.

Trade approved: yup. Amazingly enough, Dirk is pretty tradeable.

New Jersey:
q1: barely

This makes the most sense to me. Why? Kobe will not shut up about wanting to play with a point guard like Kidd. specifically, Kidd. And this moves him from LA to Jersey... to Brooklyn. The Brooklyn Nets begin play in 2009. Imagine Kobe. In New York. Hooootttt.

Let's assume for this discussion that Carter's gone in free agency. Good riddance, you're getting Kobe F'ing Bryant.
-Jason Collins/sign and trade with Mikki Moore, Richard Jefferson, first round pick in 2007, second round pick in 2009.
The best case scenario would be to keep Jefferson, but it just ain't happening, since he's the only player of value on the Nets with the contract. Trading Kidd would defeat the purpose. If this trade goes down, there have to be follow up trades with another team. Lakers would almost certainly have to get rid of Odom or Bynum, and more than likely the Nets have to pick up a rebounder, someway somehow.

Yes, I know that Portland is guaranteed to win a championship inside four years. I know they have the best future of any NBA franchise. That's just it. They're an NBA franchise, therefore stupidity is the apple of Eden for them.

q1: Um....yeah.
q2: It'll be a major NBA city after they win six championships!

-I can't believe the numbers on this work, but.... Zach Randolph, La Marcus Aldridge, and first round pick in 2008. It doesn't seem like enough, but the Lakers would have such heat from Kobe for this deal... Jesus.

1.Brandon Roy
2.Kobe Bryant
3.Gregg Oden

You don't need forwards. That's it. Just put those three on the court, and they'll win 60 games.

option 2:

-brandon roy, Zach Randolph, and first rounder in 2009/second rounder in 2007.

DUMB. But, hey, the thought could be, "let's just put oden/durant and kobe together, and we can find people in a year to do the rest."

Worst case scenario:
-the #1 pick in the 2007 NBA draft, La Marcus Aldridge, and Raef LaFrentz.

Well, you've got Brandon Roy, Kobe Bryant, and Zach Randolph!